WEDDING PLANNER VS. WEDDING COORDINATOR
The wedding planner & coordinator roles are the most alike of the services that I’ve listed. However, a wedding planner typically includes the day of coordination but a coordinator does not include planning. In either case though, the planner or coordinator’s role is to work as your agent, communicate your needs, and hold the big picture
We hear a lot of different terms used to describe similar but different roles within the wedding that relate to the wedding planner role. I want to shed some light on the differences that these roles have to help you make the best choice for your needs. It is worth noting that some vendors may provide these individual services or a combination of them. You will want to request clarification when interviewing vendors to make sure that your bases are covered.
Wedding Decorator
This vendor specializes in decor installation. You will provide the decor & the design. They may also provide tear down services post event as well. In most cases, their service is labor only and does not include any product. This service does not include coordination or organizational services in most cases.
Wedding Designer
As the name suggests, this vendor works with you during the planning process to create the design aesthetic. This encompasses colors & motif, table settings, fonts, stationery & signage, floral selections, linens, lighting etc. It is important to clarify installation services with this vendor such as how they coordinate with venue/rental companies/and florists as needed.
Wedding Coordinator/Day of Coordinator/Day of Management
I find a range of services that vendors provide under these terms. Frequently the working relationship with this vendor begins somewhere around one month prior to the wedding. At this point most of the planning will be completed but all of the plans down to minute detail will need to be communicated to the wedding coordinator. They will likely help you create or refine the day of timeline, help you submit final numbers to the caterer, venue & rental companies. Sometimes this service will include a walkthrough of the venue prior to the rehearsal. Otherwise, they will provide coordination services at the rehearsal, working with the officiant. On the wedding day, typically they will assist vendors as they arrive onsite to get settled in. This service may also include some decor set up & tear down as well. Their main focus will be to coordinate between you, the bridal party, family, and vendors. This coordination is communicating in real time between all of the involved parties to make sure that everyone is kept current with schedule and plans. The role of an independent coordinator is different from a venue coordinator. A venue coordinator’s role first and foremost is as an employee of the venue. They are responsible to oversee venue staff and the service that you are receiving from the venue. An independent coordinator’s first responsibility is to oversee your day and the service that you are receiving from all of your vendors. A venue coordinator and an independent coordinator’s roles are complimentary to each other, not opposed.
Wedding Planner
This is the most involved of all roles here. A wedding planner becomes involved as soon as you hire them. You will get the most benefit from their services if you hire them at the very beginning of your planning process prior to hiring any of your other vendors. However, if you have already started planning and realized later that you desire to have that role filled by a pro, you will still gain benefit from hiring one in your current stage. A wedding planner’s role is to assist you with defining your desires, vision, and budget for the wedding day. They will be able to help you set expectations and create the steps to achieve the vision. Their role throughout the planning and on the wedding day is to act as the agent of the couple. They will advocate for you with vendors & other involved parties. It’s their responsibility to learn the individual workings of each of your vendor’s services to ensure that the roles are coordinated in sync with each other. This allows you to receive the best outcomes from each vendor and cohesive organization of the wedding day.
In conclusion
The wedding planner & coordinator roles are the most alike of the services that I’ve listed. However, a wedding planner typically includes the day of coordination but a coordinator does not include planning. In either case though, the planner or coordinator’s role is to work as your agent, communicate your needs, and hold the big picture in mind as the planning and wedding occur. As a wedding planner, I completely understand the desire to plan & design your own wedding. I understand that there may be multiple motivations to DIY-the exercise of creativity, concern that your vision may not be achieved by someone else, or budget. However, I would like to bring up just a couple of considerations for you. First, you will need to be very intentional about ensuring that wedding planning doesn’t take away from these precious moments of your life. Second, create a plan for boundaries with volunteer wedding planners that pop up in your life-family members or friends. Whatever direction you take, make sure that your relationship and marriage are kept front and center!
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10 Things to Consider When Choosing Your Wedding Venue
Define your priorities - quiet setting, comfortable bathrooms, climate controlled, proximity to lodging & airports etc. One of the easiest ways to
Define your priorities - quiet setting, comfortable bathrooms, climate controlled, proximity to lodging & airports etc. One of the easiest ways to narrow down a venue search is to apply some of these priorities from the beginning of your search.
Is the venue’s capacity at least 10% more than your anticipated guest list? Your goal should not be to max out a venue’s capacity for the sake of comfort. You want space for mingling and dancing in addition to seating.
Does the venue have adequate parking for guests in the event that group transportation is not an option? If you are providing guest transportation, does the venue have easy access for large vehicles? A significant challenge with access is narrow streets/roads where a bus doesn’t have space to turn around. If this is any level of concern with your chosen venue, you will want to have this discussion with transportation companies that you interview to make sure that they will be able to service your wedding.
Are there spaces in the venue to accommodate a contingency plan in case of inclement weather (rain, winds, high heat or cold)? One of the easier contingencies to plan is a rain contingency. More difficult is for wind, a hot summer’s day, or cold at an outdoor or non climate controlled venue. It is important to note that barn venues are very difficult to cool and actually trap heat, making them an uncomfortable option for summer. No portion of the day should be planned without a contingency even if it is a short portion of the day, like the ceremony. Ceremony spaces should be planned for shade if the day is sunny for two reasons - the safety and comfort of your guests, and for the lighting of your photos.
Does the venue have a staging area for vendors/vendor supplies as well as the bridal party during down times? You and your bridal party will need a place to wait until you walk down the aisle, as well as store personal items. Your vendors will need a space for storing boxes & totes from decor and rest during breaks.
When you book with the venue, will you have exclusive use of the grounds? Once again, this depends on your priorities, but if having the grounds exclusive to your wedding is important to you, do check into this before booking.
Does the venue have adequate restrooms or at least provide a restroom trailer? This is purely one of my pet peeves as a wedding planner, but I believe that any venue that charges for their space, should provide a restroom option.
If the venue does not also provide catering, do they have a commissary kitchen for a caterer to use? This isn’t absolutely necessary, but it will limit the options of catering companies that would be able to serve you. The caterer would either need to have a mobile unit or be located within an hour or so of your venue to ensure that the food is served in safe conditions.
How much time does your rental of the venue include? Consider set up and decor pick up times. You will want to make sure that you have adequate time for rental pick ups as well as arrangements made for picking up your personal decor items. Most rental companies need to schedule their pickups for a least the day after the wedding if not two days later.
Does the venue’s restrictions on decor align with your needs? This question comes down to your desires for design. Common restrictions to be aware of are restrictions on real flame candles or on hanging design pieces. Make sure you review the contract and ask the venue contact for restrictions before booking to make sure that they are a good fit!
Wedding Vendor Stress
For those of you who are in the beginning stages of planning your wedding, I’m writing this post especially for you! I’m sure that you would love to save yourself stress wherever possible
For those of you who are in the beginning stages of planning your wedding, I’m writing this post especially for you! I’m sure that you would love to save yourself stress wherever possible as you prepare for marriage and I have some key tips to achieve that goal.
A major point of stress that I see pop up for many couples is centered around their wedding vendors. There are fears of vendors not coming through for them, lack of communication coming from vendors, and miscommunications. Much of this can be saved early on in the process of planning by ensuring that you truly feel comfortable with your potential vendors before you sign a contract and pay a deposit.
How to hire a vendor that you can trust:
Schedule a phone call or in person meeting before hiring - ask questions about how they work, what they value or dislike about weddings, vendors that they like to work with etc. This will give you a good feel for personality/your comfort level with them as well as alert you to whether they tend to gossip or complain about their work.
Only hire vendors who will put the agreement in writing. Either the contract or the invoice should detail the scope of services (hours of service and/or products included). It is also best to have cancellation and rescheduling terms detailed as well.
Don’t hire vendors based on price! Too many couples hire vendors who are lowest cost despite reservations about how they feel about the vendor’s work or personality. It’s also a mistake to hire a vendor who is pricier based on the assumption that you are receiving the best service. Your best gauge is your gut feeling about the vendor.
Communicate your desires and vision as thoroughly as possible with your potential vendors before hiring them to give them a chance to redirect you to a vendor who would better be able to serve you.
Check out reviews for your potential vendors and pay attention to what is noted specifically in those reviews for points that align with your values.
Once you’ve hired your vendors, remember to trust the professionals. As a bride/groom planning your wedding, it can be very easy to get in your own head about the details. When you’ve done the research before hiring, you’ve set yourself up with professionals who can be your most helpful asset in developing your vision and bringing it to reality. Since vendors work many weddings every season, they will be able to give you valuable input that will make your planning much easier. Giving them space to truly serve you will allow them to fulfill their job and will provide you with the value that you paid for!
In our “Plan Like a Pro” wedding planning course, we’ve included a guide and templates for hiring vendors. It starts with thorough communication and knowing the right questions to ask. Find our course here!
The #1 Step in Wedding Planning
The purpose of this initial conversation that starts the dreaming about wedding plans is not to determine specifics of aesthetic or menu choices but to simply create the initial framework so that you know which direction you’re going with the wedding. From this point, it’s vital
On this cozy rainy fall day, I’ve lit my candle and poured my coffee to sit down with you and discuss the most important step in planning your wedding. Wedding planning has a bad reputation for being stressful, full of drama and a time to spend more money than you dreamed possible. It gets this bad name from a lack of appropriate preparation and a lack of practical information. So let’s talk about preparing yourselves so that you’ll be the anomaly to the stress filled norm.
You need to create the framework before you begin planning. I can’t stress this enough. So many couples start implementing plans and hiring vendors before they have the framework of their wedding vision in place. The framework includes the information on budget (of course!), the general guest count, and the “feel” or “atmosphere” that you envision for the day. This all starts with simply discussing your preferences and even what you didn’t like in weddings that you’ve attended in the past.
Some questions to start the conversation:
Do you like being the center of attention and being surrounded by a crowd or do you prefer celebrating alone or with your nearest and dearest?
Are you a couple with champagne taste or do you like keeping things more simple and basic?
Are you paying for the wedding yourselves? If so, how much money are you comfortable with dedicating to the wedding?
The purpose of this initial conversation that starts the dreaming about wedding plans is not to determine specifics of aesthetic or menu choices but to simply create the initial framework so that you know which direction you’re going with the wedding. From this point, it’s vital to start your research. Research what wedding vendors cost on average in the region of your wedding. This gives you the chance to reevaluate your budget and determine whether you want to eliminate and redirect spending. It’s absolutely necessary to research every vendor category before you hire any vendors! A common wedding stress occurs when you start spending and then count the cost and realize that you’ve spent in areas that don’t mean as much to you.
When your preliminary research is done, it’s time to start compiling your list of potential wedding vendors. You can find 5 practical steps to guide you through the vendor hiring process here. Don’t be afraid to reevaluate often as you plan and pieces are put into place. This will give you the peace of mind that plans and finances are on track as you go. You can be the couple that is relaxed and excited throughout your wedding planning instead of stressed and anxious!
Wedding Day Survival Kit
The key to any great event is preparation. You can relax in knowing that you have what you need and hopefully a little more..
Ok, so I know that title makes it sound like a wedding day is on par with being out in the wilderness…thankfully that’s not the case…unless, of course, you choose to get married in the wilderness. In that case, a completely different kit would be required! Over the past few years, I’ve curated the items in my “emergency kit” to items that are used most and I’ve added items that I wished that I’d had. You won’t be out in the wilderness, but you will have the peace of mind in knowing that you’re ready for the little needs that arise.
Items that I recommend having in every wedding kit:
Ginger tea (can be helpful with upset stomach or congestion)
and of course…Tissue packs
Extra makeup for touch ups throughout the day.
If any part of your day is outside, including photos, you’ll want to include Umbrellas. These ones are pretty and will look great in photos! Clear nail polish is useful for stopping runs in hosiery if you are choosing to wear pantyhose. Hand warmers are essential for warding off frostbite at winter weddings!
Best wishes as you prepare for a beautiful day!
Ria
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You Need to Dream
Every great wedding starts with a great plan and every great plan starts with productive dreaming. You may have already picked up some ideas for your wedding day as you’ve attended weddings or browsed Pinterest, but one of the first steps
Every great wedding starts with a great plan and every great plan starts with productive dreaming. You may have already picked up some ideas for your wedding day as you’ve attended weddings or browsed Pinterest, but one of the first steps that you should take before beginning your wedding planning is to sit down with your fiancé and write these ideas down. As you write, highlight them in order of importance to you. If you have different opinions on a certain point, discuss why you feel the way you do about it and how you can reach a compromise that will satisfy both parties. When my husband, Joe, and I were planning our wedding, one of my first bridal meltdowns was over the issue of having a seating chart or not. I had strategized for years for a solution where we wouldn’t need to have a seating chart while creating a comfortable social atmosphere for our guests. When Joe questioned this point based on traditional norm, I had to find a way to explain clearly why this was so important to me and how it could work to our advantage.
To give you a starting point for this conversation, a few of the key points to discuss are: setting, atmosphere, and style. These points tie in with each other and will help inform strategy for planning the wedding. Please note that this discussion isn’t for the purpose of setting anything in stone, but is rather a brainstorming session to give yourselves and your planning team a direction to begin planning the wedding.
Setting: Do you envision an indoor or outdoor wedding? Outdoor weddings will include tented and completely outdoor settings in woods, vineyards, meadows, gardens etc. Indoor options can range from churches to barns and ballrooms to warehouses. Key factors in this part of the conversation are: your willingness to create a contingency plan for any outdoor option as well as whether having a climate controlled setting is important for you. Here in New York, weather is always a question regardless of season so a contingency plan is a must unless the entire event will be held indoors. Even in indoor settings like a barn, you’ll want to research how well ventilated the space is as well as the accessibility of heating and cooling options.
Atmosphere: Atmosphere is a point that bridges between setting and style. The atmosphere includes aesthetic design and it also encompasses elements such as entertainment and any specific customs you would like to include. Questions to ask each other here are: “Are there any cultural or religious traditions that you’d like to honor in some way during the day?” “Do you see us celebrating with a party heavy atmosphere or would you lean towards a more social and conversational atmosphere?”
Style: As I mentioned, style ties in with atmosphere and the setting of your wedding. Some describing words that you could use to define your ideal day are: elegant, casual, sophisticated, relaxed, adult only, family friendly, traditional, off beat, party etc. These words are not exclusive of each other although one predominant theme will emerge as you continue to discuss your considerations for the day. One of the most important factors to discuss here is the size of your wedding. Would you like to celebrate with hundreds of friends and family or does the idea of an intimate gathering of a few of your closest people appeal to you?
As you start dreaming about your wedding, have fun with learning and making decisions together. Your wedding marks the beginning of your marriage and the planning will provide you with plenty of practice in learning more in depth what your individual preferences are and how you process through decision making. As long as you approach it with honesty and plenty of flexibility, it will be a great experience instead of following the stress filled stories that people love to tell about wedding planning.
8 Questions That Every Engaged Couple Needs to Ask
Planning your wedding is great practice for marriage! Since there will be decisions that you won’t agree on
1. Who will make the final call on a decision when we don’t agree?
Planning your wedding is great practice for marriage! Since there will be decisions that you won’t agree on, save yourselves some stress by assigning who gets to make the final call in those (few) scenarios.
2. What are our individual priorities for the wedding day?
Take some time at the beginning of your engagement to sit down and discuss the priorities that each of you have for the wedding. This will help inform where you allocate budget monies and will help you better understand each other throughout the process of decision making. Examples of these priorities may be details like a song that you’ve always dreamed of walking down the aisle to, or your fiancé may prioritize having a band instead of a DJ.
3. Who will we consult for input on decisions?
This is an important point. You will be offered unsolicited input from many sources, but you will need to determine and agree on who you trust to give the most reliable advice.
4. How much, if any, are we willing to spend over our budget?
Unless you have allowed yourself some wiggle room in your budget categories as well as a cushion to absorb miscellaneous costs that come up, this question will likely arise. You may decide that the budget is a hard budget, but it is important as a couple to make sure that you’re on the same page with this.
5. Who will we assign as our wedding day contact people?
I’m referring to your personal “buffers” here. One of the best ways to save yourself stress on the wedding day is to take a break from your phone. It’s important to have someone (like your maid of honor) assigned to be your contact person for the day. Choose someone who will understand which questions are truly vital to pass on to you and which ones are better answered by the coordinator or another party.
6. Who will we trust to coordinate our wedding?
This question is already answered if you have hired a wedding planner for coordination services. However, if that spot is still open, you’ll need to determine whether you choose to go with a professional or a competent friend. An important point to note is that a venue coordinator does not provide the same services as a planner or “day of” coordinator. The venue coordinator is there to host you and your guests and make sure that communication happens with the venue’s staff. A planner/day-of coordinator will coordinate the entire day even if there are separate ceremony and reception venues. They will handle communication with all of your vendors as well as your family and guests.
7. What details are necessary to communicate to our vendors?
Pay close attention to the information that vendors request from you as you hire them. They will let you know when the deadlines are scheduled for the information that they need. If you are planning anything non-traditional or anything that a vendor may not expect, be sure to let them know in advance so that they will be prepared to accommodate you.
8. What type of dessert will we serve?
Ok, but really…there are so many wonderful choices from cakes to frostings to pastries to chocolate fondue. Don’t rush this decision!
Remember that as a couple, planning your wedding is a team effort. You will likely have a few different priorities and that’s ok. The key is to communicate with each other and find creative ways to incorporate and weave both of your desires together.