WEDDING PLANNER VS. WEDDING COORDINATOR
The wedding planner & coordinator roles are the most alike of the services that I’ve listed. However, a wedding planner typically includes the day of coordination but a coordinator does not include planning. In either case though, the planner or coordinator’s role is to work as your agent, communicate your needs, and hold the big picture
We hear a lot of different terms used to describe similar but different roles within the wedding that relate to the wedding planner role. I want to shed some light on the differences that these roles have to help you make the best choice for your needs. It is worth noting that some vendors may provide these individual services or a combination of them. You will want to request clarification when interviewing vendors to make sure that your bases are covered.
Wedding Decorator
This vendor specializes in decor installation. You will provide the decor & the design. They may also provide tear down services post event as well. In most cases, their service is labor only and does not include any product. This service does not include coordination or organizational services in most cases.
Wedding Designer
As the name suggests, this vendor works with you during the planning process to create the design aesthetic. This encompasses colors & motif, table settings, fonts, stationery & signage, floral selections, linens, lighting etc. It is important to clarify installation services with this vendor such as how they coordinate with venue/rental companies/and florists as needed.
Wedding Coordinator/Day of Coordinator/Day of Management
I find a range of services that vendors provide under these terms. Frequently the working relationship with this vendor begins somewhere around one month prior to the wedding. At this point most of the planning will be completed but all of the plans down to minute detail will need to be communicated to the wedding coordinator. They will likely help you create or refine the day of timeline, help you submit final numbers to the caterer, venue & rental companies. Sometimes this service will include a walkthrough of the venue prior to the rehearsal. Otherwise, they will provide coordination services at the rehearsal, working with the officiant. On the wedding day, typically they will assist vendors as they arrive onsite to get settled in. This service may also include some decor set up & tear down as well. Their main focus will be to coordinate between you, the bridal party, family, and vendors. This coordination is communicating in real time between all of the involved parties to make sure that everyone is kept current with schedule and plans. The role of an independent coordinator is different from a venue coordinator. A venue coordinator’s role first and foremost is as an employee of the venue. They are responsible to oversee venue staff and the service that you are receiving from the venue. An independent coordinator’s first responsibility is to oversee your day and the service that you are receiving from all of your vendors. A venue coordinator and an independent coordinator’s roles are complimentary to each other, not opposed.
Wedding Planner
This is the most involved of all roles here. A wedding planner becomes involved as soon as you hire them. You will get the most benefit from their services if you hire them at the very beginning of your planning process prior to hiring any of your other vendors. However, if you have already started planning and realized later that you desire to have that role filled by a pro, you will still gain benefit from hiring one in your current stage. A wedding planner’s role is to assist you with defining your desires, vision, and budget for the wedding day. They will be able to help you set expectations and create the steps to achieve the vision. Their role throughout the planning and on the wedding day is to act as the agent of the couple. They will advocate for you with vendors & other involved parties. It’s their responsibility to learn the individual workings of each of your vendor’s services to ensure that the roles are coordinated in sync with each other. This allows you to receive the best outcomes from each vendor and cohesive organization of the wedding day.
In conclusion
The wedding planner & coordinator roles are the most alike of the services that I’ve listed. However, a wedding planner typically includes the day of coordination but a coordinator does not include planning. In either case though, the planner or coordinator’s role is to work as your agent, communicate your needs, and hold the big picture in mind as the planning and wedding occur. As a wedding planner, I completely understand the desire to plan & design your own wedding. I understand that there may be multiple motivations to DIY-the exercise of creativity, concern that your vision may not be achieved by someone else, or budget. However, I would like to bring up just a couple of considerations for you. First, you will need to be very intentional about ensuring that wedding planning doesn’t take away from these precious moments of your life. Second, create a plan for boundaries with volunteer wedding planners that pop up in your life-family members or friends. Whatever direction you take, make sure that your relationship and marriage are kept front and center!
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Wedding Day Survival Kit
The key to any great event is preparation. You can relax in knowing that you have what you need and hopefully a little more..
Ok, so I know that title makes it sound like a wedding day is on par with being out in the wilderness…thankfully that’s not the case…unless, of course, you choose to get married in the wilderness. In that case, a completely different kit would be required! Over the past few years, I’ve curated the items in my “emergency kit” to items that are used most and I’ve added items that I wished that I’d had. You won’t be out in the wilderness, but you will have the peace of mind in knowing that you’re ready for the little needs that arise.
Items that I recommend having in every wedding kit:
Ginger tea (can be helpful with upset stomach or congestion)
and of course…Tissue packs
Extra makeup for touch ups throughout the day.
If any part of your day is outside, including photos, you’ll want to include Umbrellas. These ones are pretty and will look great in photos! Clear nail polish is useful for stopping runs in hosiery if you are choosing to wear pantyhose. Hand warmers are essential for warding off frostbite at winter weddings!
Best wishes as you prepare for a beautiful day!
Ria
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You Need to Dream
Every great wedding starts with a great plan and every great plan starts with productive dreaming. You may have already picked up some ideas for your wedding day as you’ve attended weddings or browsed Pinterest, but one of the first steps
Every great wedding starts with a great plan and every great plan starts with productive dreaming. You may have already picked up some ideas for your wedding day as you’ve attended weddings or browsed Pinterest, but one of the first steps that you should take before beginning your wedding planning is to sit down with your fiancé and write these ideas down. As you write, highlight them in order of importance to you. If you have different opinions on a certain point, discuss why you feel the way you do about it and how you can reach a compromise that will satisfy both parties. When my husband, Joe, and I were planning our wedding, one of my first bridal meltdowns was over the issue of having a seating chart or not. I had strategized for years for a solution where we wouldn’t need to have a seating chart while creating a comfortable social atmosphere for our guests. When Joe questioned this point based on traditional norm, I had to find a way to explain clearly why this was so important to me and how it could work to our advantage.
To give you a starting point for this conversation, a few of the key points to discuss are: setting, atmosphere, and style. These points tie in with each other and will help inform strategy for planning the wedding. Please note that this discussion isn’t for the purpose of setting anything in stone, but is rather a brainstorming session to give yourselves and your planning team a direction to begin planning the wedding.
Setting: Do you envision an indoor or outdoor wedding? Outdoor weddings will include tented and completely outdoor settings in woods, vineyards, meadows, gardens etc. Indoor options can range from churches to barns and ballrooms to warehouses. Key factors in this part of the conversation are: your willingness to create a contingency plan for any outdoor option as well as whether having a climate controlled setting is important for you. Here in New York, weather is always a question regardless of season so a contingency plan is a must unless the entire event will be held indoors. Even in indoor settings like a barn, you’ll want to research how well ventilated the space is as well as the accessibility of heating and cooling options.
Atmosphere: Atmosphere is a point that bridges between setting and style. The atmosphere includes aesthetic design and it also encompasses elements such as entertainment and any specific customs you would like to include. Questions to ask each other here are: “Are there any cultural or religious traditions that you’d like to honor in some way during the day?” “Do you see us celebrating with a party heavy atmosphere or would you lean towards a more social and conversational atmosphere?”
Style: As I mentioned, style ties in with atmosphere and the setting of your wedding. Some describing words that you could use to define your ideal day are: elegant, casual, sophisticated, relaxed, adult only, family friendly, traditional, off beat, party etc. These words are not exclusive of each other although one predominant theme will emerge as you continue to discuss your considerations for the day. One of the most important factors to discuss here is the size of your wedding. Would you like to celebrate with hundreds of friends and family or does the idea of an intimate gathering of a few of your closest people appeal to you?
As you start dreaming about your wedding, have fun with learning and making decisions together. Your wedding marks the beginning of your marriage and the planning will provide you with plenty of practice in learning more in depth what your individual preferences are and how you process through decision making. As long as you approach it with honesty and plenty of flexibility, it will be a great experience instead of following the stress filled stories that people love to tell about wedding planning.
Katie & Adam's Owasco Lake Wedding
Every lake has it’s choice of locations to host beautiful weddings. Katie and Adam chose Chantelle Marie on Owasco Lake as their venue.
The Setting-Chantelle Marie Celebration Hall
Katie and Adam chose the lovely Chantelle Marie Celebration Hall just a few miles south of Auburn, NY as their wedding venue. Chantelle Marie offers the option of outdoor and indoor spaces, both of which allow beautiful lake views. I was especially glad that we had the indoor reception space on that chilly (& rainy) late October day! Katie & Adam had a lengthy guest list, so one of my main objectives in the search for their venue was to find a space that could accommodate their guests comfortably, a point on which Chantelle Marie delivered.
The bridal party booked the two vacation rentals next door owned by the venue as well. They had the convenience of being close by as well as ample and comfortable space to get ready.
The wedding planning
Katie and Adam contacted me to begin planning their wedding when they were at square one with planning. Through the course of several meetings over several cups of coffee, a few site checks, and countless emails; we decided on vendors, colors, style, and menu. It’s always satisfying to see all of the plans and meetings pay off when the details come together on the wedding day. One key mention in the wedding planning process is that we were having the discussion about their wedding photographer choices just a few weeks after Joe and I had started dating. He had been on my vendor list ever since I had worked with him the first time, but when I mentioned his name to Katie and Adam, I made sure to fully disclose that now there may be a little bias in my recommendation! They hired him on the condition that we wouldn’t break up before their wedding day, so, instead of breaking up we got engaged.
The wedding design
Late October provided the perfect inspiration for bringing in deep, saturated colors. We used a local rental company, Auburn Party Rental, for everything from linens to place settings. I ordered the bouquets, boutonnières, corsages, and bulk flowers for everything else from The Flower Cart in Penn Yan. From the bulk flowers, my team and I designed the centerpiece arrangements and aisle arrangements. Pro tip: If you are planning to DIY any part of your day including flowers, allow yourself at least triple the amount of time that you think it will take!
Takeaways
Every wedding that I plan and coordinate offers me the opportunity to learn and refine my process for future weddings. On Katie and Adam’s wedding, I learned these points:
Create a dedicated email for RSVPs or a wedding website that allows for direct RSVPs. If you are using paper RSVP cards, number each card with that guest’s RSVP number. We had a few guests send in their RSVP cards without writing their names on them.
If you want a sparkler exit photo, get sparklers for the bridal party and maybe family. Managing a crowd of guests (post open bar) with fire in their hands is risky at best.
Wedding Vendors
